A sweet text from my husband today pictured the most beautiful bouquet of flowers.  Not for me though, for our dead daughter.  I sit back tonight and wonder how many men stood in lines today buying flowers, teddy bears, chocolates not meant for their lovers, but their dead daughters instead.  Maybe a few.  I pray only a few.  
Tonight is one of those nights where death just doesn’t seem fair.  As we cried together it is so plain to see that every happy day and good day is also the worst and saddest day.  Not just today, but for the rest of our lives.  Forever.  Ugh! Maggie is not here.  Do you understand this???  It’s aweful!!  Maddening! Why? 
No one understands this.  That’s how it seems.  My heart pounds as I write this.  Pain and hurt…there are no words for this…

Happy Valentine’s Day Maggie.  You’re beautiful.
Jonna
2/14/2012 12:50:24 pm

Beautiful flowers for a beautiful girl. Prayers for y'all tonight.

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Julie Jameson
2/14/2012 12:51:34 pm

Praying for you and your family Joy.

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Stacia Hamidi
2/14/2012 01:16:29 pm

So sorry today made you miss her extra more...she will always have a piece of you everyday and every holiday that makes you pause and wish it could be different. Sending you a vitural hug right now... Maggie is so lucky to have a mommy and daddy that love her so much!

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Michelle Bentley
2/14/2012 01:34:49 pm

thank for your honest words, Joy. Thank you for helping us understand a tiny bit of what grief is like. I wish more people were open like you and Stephen have been, so that more of us would know how to be the supportive friends you, and others like you, need.

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Teresa
2/14/2012 10:43:33 pm

I'm so sorry! Love you!

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Sammie
2/14/2012 11:24:26 pm

Beautiful flowers for beautiful Maggie.
I love you Joy!

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Megan
2/14/2012 11:48:36 pm

I respect your honesty so much, Joy. Those flowers and chocolates for Maggie are perfect, since she was beautiful and sweet as well. :) Love you!

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Stacy Domel
2/15/2012 02:35:22 am

Lovely flowers for a lovely girl. Valentines day is all about heart and I know yours is filled with love for Maggie forever. The good kind of forever!

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Tandy
2/15/2012 02:38:04 am

Heavy heart for y'all! Love you!

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Brandie
2/15/2012 08:54:12 am

We were thinking about you two yesterday. Thanks for thinking of us too, even through your sadness.

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Michelle
2/15/2012 09:37:27 am

Your honesty thru all of this helps other people that have gone or might go through all that you all have and are still going thru. You are a Strong and Loving and you will always Love Maggie and that is Amazing!!! She was a very special little girl and she is watching over you and her new sister that you are carring. Many prayers for you. God Bless!

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Carol
2/15/2012 10:46:05 am

I understand

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Anne
2/23/2012 02:15:30 am

It's not fair Joy. Take comfort that Jesus is holding her and taking amazing care of her until you can see her again. Since I can't be with my baby either...I try to think of that, and remember "Jesus REALLY loves the children" from the book "Heaven is for Real".

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